GONE

Alright, that was a long break from my cigarette and food right, HAHA
(using my best Nelson laugh).

So this late night scene…

For the first time ever I did not want to go to a party, a party where I
could/would have fun. Numerous reasons… Not enough time to address the
issues during the day; hesitation. Somehow, I knew it would happen this
way; I tried to fight it – the future – sometimes you can’t all you can do
is deal with it.

The party was to celebrate a co-workers departure, moving forward,
northern bound. I’m all for partying with my co-workers. Not like the old
days though, John, not JJ. I work all day with these people and find their
personalities outside of work interesting. They’re all cool people; I know
this and spending time outside of work confirmed that.

I didn’t want to go…

I’m a push over; it didn’t take much to convince me to come out. Sure, I
played the part, not wanting to admit that I’d like to go and enjoy new
friends. I have to resist somehow plus I was sleeping when you called...

Looks like I’m out the door at 11 pm leaving for the late night scene.

The party was good; a rager, I could tell. Luckily (or unluckily) I
didn’t get there until midnight. I would’ve enjoyed the debauchery during
the early hours of the party, I’ll settle for my time though. All smiles,
all easy….

Notes:

- Being at a party when everyone is drunk makes for an interesting first impression(s).
- Seeing your co-workers act “normal” is hilarious, the good hilarious.
- Drinking mediocre beer can be a good thing (especially when you didn’t buy it).
- Dancing to cheesy 80’s music is fun, to watch ;-)
- Renting an area to party has more advantages than having a party at your house.
- Male whores are the worst type of guys. The bullshit that flows from their mouths…She's too smart to fall for that shit.
- Technology is good for blackmail.
- Making new friends is awesome. I miss it…I need more of it...
- Drinking brings out the asshole in people, especially at 4am. Fuckers….

More smiles, slightly uneasy…

She knows I wanted to be there with her. It was made clear to me that she
wants me there. I’ll heed that advice… It was good to see her in a social
scene without us being the only 2 people around. I had a moment when I thought being at the party was a mistake, I need more time to judge. I doubt she hears the comments when we're out. She showed me whats up though, quickly and quietly when no one looked (at first). She was happy to see me, showing me more of herself. She feels....

She’s cool; she’s very friendly and sociable. She's a fun person to be around. I’ve watched her interact with children, random people and friends… I like what I see, it attracts me. I like a women who can hold her own socially, intellectually and intoxicated.

Guys have a thing for her… Cant blame then though, she’s gorgeous! I've never had that second pause look until I met her, those dreamy eyes and beautiful smile. I've been able to see her in other lights as well; dealing with good times and dramatic times - I've scene her grown intimately, personally and romanticaly. I'm entranced by her eyes, calling to me, trying to outstare me and waiting for more words....

soon