GONE

"I know you've had your share of mileage in life... "

So, apparently what I said wasnt enough to make sense to you. Maybe I've misunderstood all these txt messages. I'm not hating on you mate, I'm only trying to show and tell you that things arent as bad as they seem.

Positive.

Stay Positive.

It doesnt have to be negative, I dont know why you seem to focus on the negative all the time. You're a pessimist with some views of optimism. Turn it into something positive, realize the balance and keep pushing ahead / dont give up!

Your bright and witty, enough to know when you got a good thing. Enough to make life good for yourself and others. But this professional / career banter we talk about... always negative. Why? You've accomplished more than I as far as formal education and certification, yet you complain - constantly. Are you not satisfied with your choices, with your career and life?

I know there was that bout of depression you went through.

I know it was rough when you left the game.

I know it's not been easy mate; with family, personally and spiritually.

...and I know you dont have the 60 k network admin job you wanted, hell, I'm not able to retire at 35 like I planned - but fucks alls, you have a job - a good one! You have plenty of positive things in your life; family, friends and such. You have life!

...and you have the ability to make what could be a reality.

I just dont understand why you always think negative when you have soo many good things going for you.

And then there's me... You've heard me share many personal things to you, my beliefs, thoughts and what I've learned. You've heard it being "all good" from my mouth. Hell, you've seen it for yourself! You've been able to ask me "why dont you bitch about things more often, I'm sure you see the negative." Sure, I have my "maybe this isnt a good thing" moments but when have you caught me bantering on how things should be? If you feel things arent how they should be, do something about it!

I know you have the ability, the skill and the knowledge! Fuck man, we've been down since La Roche days, we've watched each other grow, we've maintained a good friendship all these years - so dont expect me to hold back on what I need to say and feel compelled to say. I'm your friend and I wont hide what I feel I should point out to you or say to you! So if I piss you off, know I only mean good. Constructive criticism.

...and I'm sorry for cuttin on you for listening to Nelly. I only tried to put some humor to your unnecessarily intense conversation. Funny.

And last night I only wanted to see you laugh and enjoy yourself. So I tried to get you drunk, I wanted to hear you out. I think I was a good friend. I tried illustrate the virtues of being YOU. I tried to get you stoned. I hope you felt better when you left...

...dont feel bad for drinking my last pint either.

And I think you should go out this weekend, get drunk (until he room starts to spin). Smoke a few blunts of the Deeeesul and enjoy being fucked, proper. Have a good time, enjoy yourself and loosen up mate. Life is too short to think on how things should be or could be. Just enjoy it mate, smile like you dont have a care in the world - it helps! And know I'm here for you as friend...